Being decent and accountable: The third rail of politics

Any politician can be universally adored, as long as they never have to explain their beliefs, strategies or policies, or better yet, adhere to them once in office.  Such accountability, my advisers warn me, is the third rail of politics.  And, with the publishing of these first fragments of the Decent Manifesto, I am firing those advisers and finding some new ones.

The first volleys, in the effort to Just Be Decent 2012.

When Congress slashes the budgets of various departments (Education, Medicare, et al), the first strategy will NOT be to pass it on to that agency’s “beneficiaries.”  The first strategy will be to cut the fat, increase efficiency and productivity in order to ensure customers aren’t effected.  That’s what businesses have to do –well, except for oil, insurance and cable companies.

I won’t tell you how to raise your kids, other than to care for them in a decent way.  But I will tell you this: broken bones, hurt feelings, humiliation, and a little bacteria are really good for kids and help them build up immunities to same.  Government ought not meddle much into such things until they can rid the adult world of it too — and I mean the whole world.

Networks that celebrate the activities of people like the Kardashians, Charlie Sheen, Lindsey Lohan and the lot must provide equal time to the guests of Charlie Rose and other people who are doing the decent work (with equal attention to wardrobe, hair, makeup and sexy lighting).

In most of society, to foul is a bad thing.  So why is it a strategy in big league basketball?  Yes, yes, I understand why it’s done, I just don’t see why it’s accepted.  What kind of message does this send, particularly to younger fans?  (Not that the NBA has been turning out a lot of role models lately.) New rule: Foul in the last two minutes of an NBA game, you’re out, and for the next game too.  Find a new strategy.

The profession of meteorologist will now be called “rotary club emcee” or “grade school art contest judge.”  Should any practitioner object, he/she will be absolved and reinstated if he/she correctly predicts the weather (24 hours in advance) for 20 of 30 consecutive days in both Iowa and Virginia.

The field of economists will be regulated, with rigorous tests for certification.  Even so, should the prognostications of any certified economist prove false after five years, he/she will become a meteorologist.

Personal Accountability.  When the government makes a decision that adversely effects your life, go ahead and protest — that’s your right.  If you yourself make a bad decision that adversely effects your life, deal with it, learn from it, and don’t blame the rest of society for it.  And don’t expect for us to pay for it.

Stay tuned. Coming soon: how to fix education, welfare, trade and the Mideast, or at least the politician’s approach with a sense of decency to boot.

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